Please just shut up (!!!)

5 Reasons Why Depressed People are Annoying

I lived with depression for many years, and to an extent, it still surfaces from time to time.
So it is with the deepest love, understanding and respect that I say – Depressed people are annoying to be around.

Let me re-phrase that: Depressed people can be incredibly draining and difficult to deal with.

Let’s just get this out of the way first: this isn’t an article that is meant to shame people with depression for their condition or hurt them in any way.
Rather, this is written as a form of warning, coming from personal experience as well as that of many others that I have personally known.

You should not, by any means, feel validated for hurting people with depression for their condition.

That being said, one of the fundamental issues with depression is that sometimes the people that surround you are those who suffer the most for it.

That isn’t to say that people with depression aren’t suffering, but depression is a mental illness and dealing with people who suffer from it is difficult because of that.

There are reasons for that.

1) We can be very self-centered and selfish

Back when I was in the military I was suffering from depression, something that my fellow soldiers called me out on at times.
If we were given a task I was expected to pull through, regardless of how difficult it was.
When I couldn’t do that I was called selfish and self-centered.

“You aren’t the only one who’s dealing with this,” they said, “why can’t you grit your teeth and deal with it like the rest of us?”

These comments came not only from my fellow soldiers, but also from our sergeants and officers.
Some of them even used it as a shaming tactic against me, pointing out my “weakness” as they would’ve said.

People with depression are extremely selfish by nature.
When you really think about it this makes perfect sense: when you are hurt, you just want to focus on it, to deal with it.

Think for a moment, if you broke your arm you probably won’t be doing much else except for trying to get better.
You would want it treated because every moment that it wasn’t was extremely painful for you.

Depression is kind of like that, with the difference being that your pain isn’t physical and isn’t visible by extension.

Many people are ignorant of this fact, for the most part not knowing what to say or do, and end up saying and doing hurtful things.

But you know what? It’s not fair towards them to force them to understand.
Most people really do not care for your problems, and that’s fine – do yourself a favor and try to find those who do.

2) We can be entitled

In a way, this is actually a direct continuation of my previous point.

I try to keep negative people out of my life, yet sometimes there is no other way but to listen to their struggles.

This makes sense: even the happiest people have their bad times, and as their friend, it is your duty to listen and try to help.

So far so good.

But how much is your help really worth?

Most advice that is given to depressed people is pretty bad, and even if your advice is good they are probably not going to implement it without some serious coaxing.

Depression kind of sucks the energy out of you, making depressed people far less likely to actually “do” something.

In a way, depressed people are like kings.
Sitting high on their throne and looking for someone else to solve their problems, all the while disregarding any answer that isn’t to their liking without a second thought.

On many occasions, we can be rather ungrateful, taking the support and efforts of others, however ineffective at times, for granted.

I myself was in that place before, but when I got the chance to see the situation from the other side I really hated it.

Depressed woman

3) We can be needy and force our condition on others

Sometimes when we struggle in life we want someone who can share our burden.
This is something that can be observed all the time in day-to-day life:

  • Many people go to a psychologist just so that can have someone that will listen to them
  • Friends rant about their problems to their friends
  • People create personal blogs to articulate and share their thoughts and feelings
  • Lonely people find themselves hungry for attention, talking with anyone and everyone

This makes sense.
Learning to connect to others is vitally important to our mental health, more so if we suffer from depression.

In fact, the reclusive nature of depressed people is making their condition worse, like a never-ending cycle.

But what if the other person just doesn’t want to talk to us?
Imagine this – You talk to a friend of yours about how much life is pointless or whatever.

Normal depression things.

Your friend listens, and you feel better from having them listen to you!
So next time you will do this again, and again and again and so forth.

At this point though, your friend is kind of stuck.
Even if dealing with you is becoming emotionally draining (which it can be, caring for a depressed person is not easy) they can’t really outright say it without coming off as a jerk.

Because of it, they might start to resent you

It’s not fair to treat your friends as your emotional crutches to the point where they, metaphorically, break from the weight.
You need people that will listen for you, sure, but having a few of them to share the burden between them might help.

Treating them with care, like the precious people that they are, goes a long way as well.

4) We are really negative people and we really let others know that

I often find myself giving people the following advice: Try to remove toxic people from your life

To me, it makes perfect sense.
After all, most of us have people in our life that are making it worse.
Family members, co-workers, and ‘friends’ that we really could do without.

The thing is, as bad as it is to say, depressed people often find themselves in this category.
We feel bad about our life and we can be rather forceful with this sort of negative view.

I was actually on both sides of this argument before.
When I was depressed I was determined to ‘explain my viewpoint’ to others, shrugging off their “hippy ‘happiness’ nonsense”, and going into detail as to why life is terrible.

When I was trying to help a friend of mine who had depression I was on the receiving end of all of that.

It sucked. Really.

It would make perfect sense to cut off this type of person from your life, and unless you are genuinely close to them you probably should.

You should only talk about your condition with people who are close to you and would be willing to listen.
When talking with anyone else try to keep this to yourself.

Supporting a loved one

5) We are terrible people to be around

From an outside perspective, depressed people are just plain bad people to hang out with:

  • They have no sense of humor
  • They don’t really react to anything
  • Forget about getting them to hang out with you
  • They’ll usually stay quiet and will not often contribute to the conversation
  • They are not interested in most forms of interaction

The list goes on and on, but the point still stands: depressed people are kind of… boring.

Not without reason though.
Depression is a mental illness, meaning that it makes day-to-day life difficult.

They can try to “act normal”, in which case this entire list goes out of the window, but they end up seriously suffering from it.
Repressing your condition is only going to make it worse.
I think that most of us can attest to that.

A part of “day-to-day” life includes social interaction, something that depression utterly wrecks.

It’s at moments like these that you find out who your real friends are.
After all, people who care about you will be able to look past this and see your problems for what they are.

Not so much for most other people.

All of that being said, you shouldn’t turn your back on us

If we were to be fully objective then depressed people are some of the worst people you can spend your time with.

But humans aren’t really objective and rational creatures to begin with, so there’s a silver lining here.

Look, the lifetime prevalence of major depression is, on average, anywhere between 14%-19% of the population.
Furthermore, a fairly large percentage of the population suffer from depression at any given time.

You probably know someone who suffers/has suffered from depression in the past.
In other words, you probably know a person who will be able to sympathize with you on this level.

They only reliable way to find them would be to try to connect with them first to see who they are.
This will not always be easy, but it’s something that you will benefit from in the long run.

If you are reading this article and know of someone with depression who’s like this, you should try to help them to the best of your ability.

Well, as long as you are willing.

In my experience, however, the person who can help you most with depression is yourself.
To that end, I highly recommend checking out the Destroy Depression program.
In my experience, it is a great first step on your self-help journey. At the very least you should give it a look.

For any other question feel free to comment down below or send me an email

Email: [email protected]

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43 thoughts on “5 Reasons Why Depressed People are Annoying”

  1. Well, here it goes.
    you are 100 percent right, they are totally annoying and selfish. They suck the life out of you and they are the most self centered and negative people I have ever had the misfortune of coming into contact with.
    you cannot do enough for them. Why don’t you people ever consider that us regular joes have wants, needs and feelings too?

    1. You are right of course, your viewpoint goes to show that depressed people tend to force themselves on others.

      Still, without the help of others, some of them may never recover.
      It is my belief that, among friends and family, you are to be as patient and helpful as you can.
      If you can’t do that much then, well, you aren’t exactly being a good friend.

    2. As someone with not only depression but bipolar and high levels of anxiety, i find that belitteling to the people who do suffer such as myself. I do in fact consider the people around me and there wants and also there needs and the fact that you claim that we are selfish and that we “suck the life out of you” is borderline offensive. By saying that rather than opening up your heart and showing compassion to those who suffer you single handedly may have taken away someones voice or a chance to speak out. if that was a close friend or a family member who was stuggling you wouldnt turn your back against them. i like to think myself as being fun and happy go lucky regardless of my illness you have to take into account that although some depressed people are more vocal about their illness compared to those who dont suffer with a mental illness such as depression we dont do that in order to bore you or be selfish we do that in order to cope and to understand that although everyone may not understand we are not alone in fighting against something that is wired into the mind that can change from person to person. talking is coping especially for something like myself.

      1. Hello Anna,

        I’m sorry that you found this post hurtful, it was not my intention to insult you.

        Depression is something that you should discuss with other people, and it is proven that simply talking about your condition can improve your mental health considerably.

        The purpose of this article was twofold:

        On one hand, to caution depression sufferers from opening their hearts to the wrong people – Doing so will only cause them to reject you, either by ignoring you or reaction in a volatile way, both of which will make your condition worse.

        On the other hand, it is meant as a warning for people who do not suffer from depression but know/are friends with people who do.
        When writing this article I had hoped that some of these people would learn to recognize this type of behavior and become more tolerant of it.

        I am not a licensed professional – I have written this article based on personal experience.
        My own mother helped me with my depression more than anyone else. Alternatively, I have pushed away many people due to the way that I was acting.

        I just hopped to help spare at least some of my readers the same fate.

        Vlad

        1. Vlad– Though I think your article could’ve used more tact and worded a bit differently in some areas, I 100% agree with both Anna and your response here. It’s a very tough, unfair pill to swallow for those that are depressed, but I believe it is as important to be aware of how you are perceived so you’re not unintentionally pushing people away. Suffering from depression makes it very easy to become blind to this.

          1. Hi Ashley,

            It is a serious problem all the same – Opening your heart to the wrong people in the wrong way can have terrible effects on your mental health.
            If my content offended you in any way I do apologize.

            Cheers,
            Vlad

        2. I enjoyed reading your article, it was just how you felt, maybe people might be offended and think other wise but I actually found your reply to certain depressed individuals quite interesting and funny. Being around people who bring our energy down is no fun, I agree that others who suffer from mental illness are going through their own personal issues and it’s not about us, that’s why I am honest with the people I love who do suffer from it and tell them “I don’t have the energy today.” Just to save myself and them the time.

  2. I have bipolar depression and I cannot refute all of the claims in this article, as hurtful and derogatory, and overgeneralized as they are (at least in my opinion). I know that you’ve been through it and this is based on what you’ve seen and experienced, but I sure hope you know better than to place all depressed people in these stereotypical categories. I know so many depressed people (myself included) who hide their depression from friends and family for fear of being labeled this way. If we stay quiet, we suffer in silence. If we speak out and reach for help, then according to this article, we are “terrible,” “needy,” and “entitled.” I personally would rather be told straight away that I’m annoying and selfish, than have the displeasure of having “friends” who secretly view me in the way that this article does. Thank you for the insight and the small section at the end where you encourage people to not abandon their depressed friends. But I honestly don’t think that dwelling on offensive stereotypes is going to help anyone, especially the people who don’t know how to reach out to a friend in need.

    1. Hello there, thanks for reaching out.

      You are right of course, hiding your depression from people who genuinely want to help you is a terrible thing to do and will only hurt you.
      But I myself have pushed away many people by coming on too strong with my disorder.

      Many depressed people, including myself, want to share what they feel with others, and most people just don’t want to hear that.
      And there’s nothing wrong with that.

      The point is that you should choose a small group of people that truly want to help you and focus your efforts on them. They are the only ones who will put a sincere effort into helping you.
      others are simply not got to care, and either hurt you with their uncaring nature or be hurt by your overpowering self.

      Look, I know that these comments might be hurtful, but better to be hurt by a person you don’t know than someone that you’ve considered a friend up to that point.

      Cheers,
      Vlad

      1. I have been married to a man with depression for 20 years. This article made me laugh because it is so true without getting real deep. These are things I cannot say to my husband because it would just cause problems. Over these years I have grown as a person and have chosen happiness even though my husband just finds fault with me. I am only in control of my actions and I have only tried to help him and never been cruel. I cannot say the same for him. I am finally at the point I am truly happy and will not be manipulated. It feels good to be happy and also a kind wife. But this article made me laugh. Thank you for that. I know it may have been hurtful for some but remember the people who stand by your side every day and love you. This depression affects us differently but is incredibly hurtful to us too. The caretakers are forgotten in this.

    2. I agree so much with you about hiding everything and suffering on your own in order to not be criticized like this, and I also cannot refute the allegations made in the article.i think that’s because even though we hide our pain and try to fight on our own , the suffering unconsciously make us into a selfish, entitled , needy sort of person. The only difference is that ppl consider it as a part of having a shitty personality instead of relating it to mental illness and pitying us!

  3. Hello Vlad,
    I have a sister who is severely depressed and super duper annoying.!! I am literally baby sitting her and she is 33 years old. The worst part is that i feel I am slowly slipping into depression staying with her. I am not a positive person to begin with but i do have an analytical thinking. Parents are not at all supportive and leaving her with them is going to make her worse. But her selfishness and stupidity just seems to increase everyday and i have been offensive to her too in the heat of the moment. She is into therapy but the counselling doesnt seem to help much.. I have also almost lost my patience with her. What do i do! She has been depressed for 2 years now and is speaking about suicide almost everyday.

    1. Hey there, thanks for reaching out.
      I should make it clear right off the bat that I am not a licensed professional.

      I understand that your sister might be difficult to deal with, but she is your sister all the same.
      You are expected to be one of the few who will genuinely be patient with her and support her, and I realize that this might be unfair, but that’s how it is.

      In my case, counseling also proved to be rather unhelpful – have you tried other forms of therapy?
      Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) for example, is a method that focuses on treating depression through habits.

      Having a balanced diet, exercising regularly and practicing meditation are a few examples of things that can genuinely help.
      I have covered these topics on my website extensively, so feel free to check them out.

      That being said, overcoming depression takes effort – there are no magical solutions.

      Cheers,
      Vlad

  4. No you shouldn’t always care for depressed person. You aren’t a caretaker and there I’d chance they make you feel afwull. Sometimes the right thing to do is take distance for your own sake. I tried to help my depressed friend and nothing worked. He couldn’t be happy for me either. I had enough. My own mental health is more important to me.

    1. Hi,

      Well, naturally you shouldn’t try and give more to them than you are willing.
      Still, many people who suffer from depression genuinely reach out to get help instead of forcing their worldview on others.
      It’s up to their friends to provide support, unless they’re unwilling to of course, which is also fine.

      Cheers,
      Vlad

  5. Yes, hurtful as it sounds, mood disordered people can be very, very difficult to be around (especially if you cannot walk away if they are family). Yes, their suffering is real, as with a broken bone. The difference is they break their bones over and over again. Or blame you for breaking them. Or want you to feel the pain of the break for them. Or deny they are broken to begin with when others can clearly see the break. If people with actual breaks acted this way then yes, their friends would likely distance themselves. That is the difference when mood disorders get compared to things like cancer. I think all are entitled to compassionate, non-stigmatizing care. No one is entitled to a relationship, those must be earned.

    1. Hey Bob,

      Your assessment is certainly fair, but a relationship goes both ways.
      It may be expected of them to be more sensible, but it is also expected of you to be a friend and provide support.
      Being supportive and helping a friend in need are two requirements of friendship.

      That being said, in some cases it is best to give up on said friendship altogether.

      Cheers,
      Vlad

  6. Depression is a treatable mental disorder – instead of being unhelpful and complaining please guide them towards help. From personal experience, CBT is extremely helpful (unless in severe cases, where medication might be necessary). Although I understand you are entitled to your own opinion, I hope we work together to treat as many people as we can with depression

    1. Hi there,

      This entire website is dedicated to help depression and anxiety sufferers with their condition.
      This article is meant to do the same thing.
      After all, it is important to recognize how our condition affects others. I have pushed away many people because I did not understand this very fact.

      Hence why I built this website.

      Cheers,
      Vlad

  7. Thank you for shedding light on the effects of depression on the people who care for them most.
    It’s really hard to walk on eggshells, be helpful, understanding, a good listener while the person you are helping is struggling to survive not realizing that they are being difficult, offensive and or self centered. It can really hurt when they say things to you or others that are unfair and hurtful, do to their filter being obscured by depression.

    1. You are of course correct in saying that depression sufferers are not an easy demographic, but once they choose to try and get better the results can be quite a sight to behold.

  8. I agree! I can only be around depressed people for so long. They’re mentally draining for me. I agree with those who said that their ow mental health is more important.

    My first gut reaction is that if someone is vocal or “obvious” about being depressed, it’s because they’re seeking attention. And not always because they seriously want help. The “misery loves company” adage. They want to prove to other people that they are suffering miserably. And then there’s the media, slapping the “depression” label on every little bit of sadness anyone should ever experience.

    All in all, I will offer advice if it seems they’re seeking it. Just don’t expect me to be your lifetime caretaker and sounding board. YOU yourself are what ultimately makes you depressed. I think we’re too quick to disregard our own ability to fix ourselves. I think cognitive therapy (if the patient actually attempts it) will achieve way more than chugging pills to just dull any feeling at all. But pills are an easier route than addressing your life. How many doctors just give people a prescription as the first course of action, right?

    Not to say that some people should n’t take medication, at least initially, but there are some things that pills just can’t fix. I honestly believe that a lot of the “chemical imbalances” that we suffer are from our own response to our lifestyle: being overweight, divorce, stressed over school or bills, work, etc. people are hard put to stray off the usual responses, and prefer instead to take the ingrained go-to route.

    1. It should be noted that most cases of depression, 60% of them, did not qualify as a depressive disorder upon re-evaluation.
      That being said, the vast majority of cases of depression were never diagnosed in the first place – most people with depression don’t really talk about their condition all that much.

  9. This is not what ‘depressed’ people do, this is what ‘selfish’ people do. There are lots of people who suffer in silence and there are lots of people who try to do everything they can to help themselves. I read through this entire article and I found it very annoying, but your heart was in the right place.

    1. I think that to some degree we are all selfish.

      Suffering in silence is absolutely terrible for your mental health, but depression *can* make you push other people away.
      The point here is that being mindful of who you approach and how you approach them can benefit all of the involved parties.

      Thank you for your time, in any case!

    2. Do you have a reputable source for the statistic that 60% are incorrectly diagnosed with depression? This would be a useful statistic for me to have more proof of as I was misdiagnosed with depression for over 20 years until I went into counseling for a short but abusive relationship. Its there that we uncovered the real problem. I was dealing with the aftermath of childhood emotional neglect from my family and excessive and repetitive emotional invalidation/gaslighting from my family as an adult. Both problems are hard to diagnose because the symptoms look like its a problem with the individuals phycology when in reality its a normal response to a dysfunctional family dynamic. The specific diagnosis I have is childhood emotional neglect and narcissistic abuse syndrome, as one of my caregivers was an covert narcissists and the other was an enabler. Thus Id like to have a statistic to share with those who were told of my depression diagnosis to show how often a depression diagnosis can be wrong. And FYI, after taking a break from my caregivers, replacing them with an abuse recovery support group, within six months of therapy and at home efforts Im more alive, happy, and full of life than I was after 20 years of counseling and drug therapy. The proper diagnosis was all I needed to get better. Once that happened, all the tools I needed for recovery were at my finger tips!

  10. As a depressed person this “blog” entry is entirely unhelpful to a population dealing with a medical issue. Depressed people are not selfish; using hat terminology adds to the already awful stigma. People with depression suffer with something that causes them to be able to effectively care for themselves and their relationships.

    Replace depression with any other medical disorder and see how that statement sounds. “Cancer patients are selfish, I shouldn’t have to do her work”, “I told him how to manage his diabetes my way, and he was ungrateful”, etc…

    Last point, suicide is not something that needs to be hid and ashamed of. It needs to be brought to the light and talked about. If we keep it a secret it will continue to get worse.

    Yeah, I really have more but this is astonishing and deeply hurtful to people dealing with mental health problems.

    1. Hi there,

      It was not my intention to hurt anyone – on the contrary.
      From an outside point of view, people with depression are not the easiest to handle.
      I have pushed away many people in my life because of my disorder, and as such, I recommended talking about your condition only with people who are truly interested in listening and are willing to try and help you.

      Regardless of the reason, forcing yourself on someone is not okay.

      My use of the word “selfish” was just as you described – I compared having depression to having your arms broken.
      In both cases, you may come across as needy and difficult but doesn’t mean that you are not in deep pain or don’t deserve to be heard.
      My use of the word “selfish” was ironic, and I debunked this notion at the end of the article.

      Suicide is not something that a person should keep to themselves – If you have suicidal thoughts you definitely need to talk to someone about them.
      Just make sure that it’s someone who won’t get annoyed at you for doing so.
      Being pushed away by someone that you opened your heart to will only make you feel worse

      The message of this article is “Find someone to talk to about your condition, just make sure that they are willing to listen.”
      I wrote this article from personal experience, and if I listened to this bit of advice a few years back I might’ve been a happier person today.

  11. I see what your saying for sure. I believe the skills you are talking about or kinda an awareness on how people are preceiving you. Some people you can be real and share your deepest emotions with, others you can’t. Some want to it all the time, others only sometimes. You want to make sure you don’t get so lost in your suffering that you ignore the world. A problem I’ve had to many times. It really is not getting to lost. The typical person with depression would read this and say “you should be real with all people” taking what I’m saying out of context. A issue all of us have. It’s easy to stay isolated. Good read as I try to learn as a person

  12. Your articles are quite lovely! I appreciate your bravery- most mentally ill people don’t like to be accused of “bad attitudes, feeling sorry for themselves, playing the victim” because mental illness isn’t their fault and they don’t like to be stigmatized and blamed for their condition because it makes them hate themselves more than they already do. But we CAN be a pain in the gut sometimes and it’s refreshing to see someone speak up about that. There is a question lingering though. A lot of the information in this article seems more aligned with self-pity than mental illness. Mentally ill people will usually try their best to get better, not worse, once they recognize they have a problem. For me, I actually got worse after diagnosis and sunk deeper into self-destructiveness. Depressed people can self-pitying, victim playing, attention-seeking, selfish, childish, and unwilling to help themselves sometimes. But how do we distinguish these self-defeating and toxic depressives from the people who are just wallowing for pity, sympathy and attention? It’s a vague line I’m sure, but is there a difference?

    1. Hi Kip, thanks for the kind words!

      I would like to say once more that mentally ill people are not “sorry for themselves” or “playing the victim” – It’s not their fault that they suffer from one mental disorder or another.

      I wouldn’t call this reaction to depression “self-pity”, either.
      Rather, I think that “hopelessness” would be a much more accurate description – Many people who suffer from depression lose faith in their ability to ever get better, believing that they are doomed to a life of misery.

      I have known many people who are like that, and to some degree I felt like that myself from time to time.

      Here’s the thing though – That doesn’t make them any less, or more, deserving of your support.
      The point here is that you can’t just “force” yourself onto other people – find those who would accept you and lean on them.
      That’s actually a pretty specific category of people: Many of your friends wouldn’t want to spend time with you when you’re, from their point of view, “unloading” all of your problems onto them.

      It takes a special kind of person to stick by you and listen to you, yet at the same try to actively help you improve without being too forceful about it.
      Once you find someone like that don’t let them go, no matter how much you want to be alone (believe me, that’s depression talking)

      Cheers,
      Vlad

  13. Dame, this is exactly how I feel like I’m with others. I’ve never went to a therapist, my parents don’t believe in mental illnesses. However, I’ve experienced all anxiety types besides OCD (according to 5 tests I took on my own time, and they all said severe, including depression). I’ve tried to keep within myself, I know that nobody does care. I tried to talk with my best friend once, and she just blew me off and changed the subject. This was a year ago, when I was twelve. I’ve hidden within myself, but all these feelings are starting to bubble over, and I cry myself to sleep. I hate to admit this, I’m a complete stranger to all of you, but, I just wanted to point out how right that this article is. I do feel selfish when I complain to others. I do feel like I’m way too needy on my friends, and I realize that other people have lives, and they never complain about theirs. I just.. feel so lonely in this world, and yet I don’t want to bother others, because they’ve experienced their own deal of cards too. But, yeah, this article is right, at least about myself. I am a conceited, annoying brat, and I wish I knew how to change it. Even throughout this comment, I am probably acting like a jerk.. but, yeah, just, have a nice day, and thank you very much to anyone who looked and listened to a part of my story..

  14. Dear, Vlad

    I am happy that I came across your article, I agree and disagree with you
    on so much of it. I understand your article wasn’t written to be offense, but more informative and I am thankful for that. I am glad you also shared how you went through depression yourself and had experience with others that had it as well. That being said, I do think you sound pretty harsh and I am guessing thats not what you meant the tone to be. I get what you’re saying that depressed people can be self-centered and negative nelly’s, and I do agree that’s important for you or the person interacting with them do it from a safe distance, where you aren’t to emotionally invested into them. I am also thankful for all the replies you have sent to people, you made it clearer about what your real goal is and that you didn’t mean to hurt others feelings. Because, I really don’t believe that all depressed people are all that similar. What I am saying your right every depression people may have these negative qualities, but everyone have different levels of these qualities and most people either don’t have these qualities stop them from being still being good people or they don’t mean to put you through so much pain too.

    1. You are absolutely correct Emma.
      It is only recently that I started to understand the tone of this article, and I will be editing it in the near future.

  15. I commend you for attempting to tackle this important subject. I’d like to give you some feedback if you don’t mind. I find that your article was a bit repetitive. It could have used more depth and your points could have been made more succinctly. One of the messages I heard many times over sounded to me like “I don’t mean to insult you, but I’m going to insult you anyway “. As valid as your points may be, there are many other kinder and more effective ways to express them. Maybe you were having a difficult day when you wrote the article.
    I don’t know if you’ve heard of a therapy called dialectical behavior therapy (DBT). It is very effective in treating borderline personality, depression, bipolar disorder and anxiety. One of the many practical skills they teach is how to deal with interpersonal communication effectively. I encourage you to learn more about it. It has helped me greatly and it might help you too.

    1. A fair criticism Rosalba – I will be editing this article in the near future.

      I actually have heard of it, but I haven’t quite gotten into it, an interesting recommendation – Thanks you for sharing it!

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